What to do when it is hard to love your partner?

hard to love your partner

Have you ever felt like throwing in the towel and giving up that life because it has become hard to love your partner again, this is the section for you? so many things can come our way and we come almost to a conclusion of not loving our partners because it has become really hard to do so.

Here is what to do when it is hard to love your partner. This is what sparks up that flame again and find love and love your partner.

Understand yourselves

Often times misunderstanding in a relationship begins when the two parties cannot reconcile their parts. You cannot live on the same roof and not know your partner. The partnership you have entered is a life partnership and partnership need communication and without understanding, there can be no true communication.

You have to study your partner very well. The times we are leaving in has almost failed to understand the meaning of courtship and so the real courtship begins mostly when people are married. The time they were supposed to understand their partner before marriage was used to settle a certain desire and so the real-time, they start to be serious is when they are married.

Your partner might not like it when you laugh too loud, understand that and change. Marriage and relationship is all about adoption and mutation, you must start to be like the other partner, you have to mold and mutate according to the tune, for this is the reason for understanding them.

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Give yourselves the best

You make what you want. No want will get hundred percent of the package. They give you junk and you hold the responsibility to transform it into a treasure. There is a common thing in Africa that when the wife is gaining weight then the husband is doing a good work. This is true, the real you is seen in your partner.

This is the reason why Proverbs said that the husband of the virtuous woman is known in the gates and that he sits with the elders. You polish each other and perfect each other. You will never find the perfect match but you will always find someone who needs polishing. Understand that you have a great job of making your marriage the place and the atmosphere you want.

This then calls for anyone in a relationship to always offer the best to their partner. If being it word, confess and speak those positive words because those works have the power to make, see their weaknesses and correct them and also allow to be corrected because you are never hundred percent perfect.

Be willing to accept any outcome

A product or a commodity once sold cannot be refunded. You get what you ordered and you must accept the outcome and the thing you ordered. No one will always have the mandate to choose your partner for you, you hold this decision and the thing you choose is what you get.

This should teach many people a great lesson that the time of courtship must be taken carefully so that the description you read describes the product that you want. But no one really get the perfect gift always and so anything that comes in between should be accepted.

You must accept the outcome of some of your choices as a family, this will not push you to try and be like the other couple you watched on movie. This will make you to love your partner no matter what has happened on the way because you are ready to take full responsibility of the situation you went through as a couple or alone.

Submit to your partner

Two people can never walk without opposition unless they have agreed. That is the principle, unless the two people can agree on a common line, there will always be fights because everyone will start to seek their own.

Marriage joins the two partners to become one body, this body must move in the same direction in order for it to progress. The hand cannot go the other direction when the rest of the body is moving the other direction, the members of the body must reconcile themselves and move as a unit.

This is the part submission plays; submission settles the difference and draws a thin line where the two will become one in thinking and action and then they will agree to walk in the same direction and follow the right way because they are focused on each other and not themselves alone.

Understand your priorities

Everyone has the thing the treasure the most and sometimes these are the things that can bring all sorts of fights in a relationship. For example, one partner might be so much attached to their obsessions like sports and this obsession takes much of the time and the little time is given to build that relationship.

You must be up to something always, for example Paul said that when he was still a young child all his thoughts and actions were of a young child but when maturity set in, he had to abolish the childish behaviors. You cannot start living like one who is not in a relationship when you are engaged and committed to someone.

Value the time you have together as a partner because in this you learn more about each other and you bond better. If it means cutting off some friends so it to settle the gap, have a purpose and walk in counsel and in the light always and then you will understand your priorities surely.

Do not frustrate them

The worst thing you can ever do is to pour more salt to the wound that has been inflicted already. The best way of saying sorry is always to change your behavior and reaction to the situation. Sometimes, it might have been you who has caused all the trouble and when you continue to do the same thing then you frustrate your partner the more.

You must give them comfort and not frustrate them. You might be the one that was hurt the most but when you start to frustrate, you create guild and when this sets in it is like a wound in the born. In whatever that has happened, do not make the situation worst by frustrating your partner.

Do not return evil for the evil that was done to you, have that compassion and carry that soft heart. Whey you are frustrated or when you frustrate your partner, this makes life generally hard and sometimes it gets a small situation and magnifies it and makes it bigger.

Be willing to endure

Living with someone you just met a year or two years ago is hard, even your best friend that you might have spend years and years but still you have some small quarrels. This should teach us what to expect, you should not be over optimistic but you should know that there are all sorts of things waiting for you.

You must therefore have a strong heart and body to endure, sometime the other can even hurt you intentionally but since you made a decision to stay together, you cannot just throw them out, you must endure, come rain come sunshine.

The problem with being too optimistic is that it creates a false impression and when the real experience comes in you might even run away. Just know that there will be good days and there will be bad days, this will reprogram your life to expect anything any day and you will be ready for them.

Focus on being happy not being right

Compromise is the order of the day. Everyone who is in a relationship should understand this language; sometimes, the thing you see as obvious will not be and so you should compromise and not go about to establish your point, for in this sometimes you pick up great fights.

Sometimes, the best way is to concede and lose in the fight but win the war, and one way of winning is sometimes giving up and letting go. Always strife for happiness and not your own way. You might be very right but what trophy will you get when your house is on fire.

Smallest of the matter has the capacity to kindle the greatest of the fire. Do not think that you have to be right every time, sometimes we also learn from our own mistakes, if the other partner is insisting on their way, just let go and let them learn from the own mistakes.

Understand your roles

The biggest cause of confusion is when there is no clear definition of roles. You must understand your part in order to play the game correctly otherwise you will score an own goal and this will greatly affect the whole game. Understand your part and play your part.

Normally when each one performs their task very well, there is nothing to talk about, the problem comes in when the other cannot and there is a gap left and this gap creates the vacuum for all sorts of strife. Each one was made different and we all have our different roles; you must understand yours in order to be effective in the affairs of your family.

Every part supplies and the fullness comes after all that is necessary has been provided. You have your part to do; never neglect your work and expect the other to cover up for you. The difference in the role also talks a lot about the difference in the abilities to perform it. If you do not do your part then it will not be done. 

Sow seed

The power of seed must be emphasized here. Everything that has grown to be great and powerful and admirable began from a small thing like a seed. Everything grow and if you want your relationship to grow, you must keep planting seeds because growth is determined by the kind of seed planted.

The first seed that many forget is the word. You have to speak well of your partner and speak the things you want of them. This is building the same thing you want from them. Do not complain about what they have not done right but impute the very righteousness you want from then and surely these things will be established.

Seed attracts greatness. What you honour will always turn back to you. When you see others having a great marriage, sow a seed there for in this you tap into the grace that they carry. So to people who are planning to wed, celebrate other people’s marriage and these things will turn back to you one day and the things you were struggling with will be gone and people will celebrate your marriage.

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