Dating a critical phenomena in the life of everyone because this involves our choice for the next person we are going to spend the rest of our life with, here are 10 dating advice for men. Marriage can be a piece of heaven or hell on earth depending on the choice of your partner. Here are 10 dating advice for Christian guys to consider in choosing the right person who is going to ease their burden.
Some people have describe being in love as an experience that can mean to switch off the other senses and make rational and unwise decisions. Finding love tends to excite us and can make us to act irrationally and unthoughtfully and this is where seeking God comes in.
The true seeker always find peace and answer in what seeks. There is nothing that will ever happen or has happened and God did not know about it. He is the all knowing God and the beginning and the end, all things start and end in Him, God is equally concerned about our personal life and that is why seeking him for the decision and the move to consider dating or when dating should be greatly considered and relied on.
There are many relationship that God never intended and they that went away with it regretted it later. God has promised that all will find the mate suitable; we can only find the suitable one when we seek the one who made the promise. It is never enough to be deceived by character and looks but what the heart of God speaks about the relationship.
The voice and counsel of God is expensive, failure to heed to his counsel or voice makes the perfect recipe for failure on our part. The one who created Eve for Adam created our own Eve, though it is for us to find her but this does not rule out the fact that we can seek him about it.
Do not hurry
The proper time for relationship is all but a preference for each person to pick nonetheless, the real deal is you must no longer be in a rush, for in case you hurry you may crash. Observe your steps, study the circumstance and the forces influencing you, sometime we would just be hurrying for the incorrect aspect whether or not with the right goal or not.
Always reconsider your decisions over and over and ask yourself is it really the right time, keep in mind it, mediate over your answer before finally putting it down into action and get guidance from God. Sometimes, it would simply be our own goals and lusts moving and influencing us, when we meditate and suppose over our decision we might be able to draw the difference and separate the left from the right.
Never move with the opinion of everyone, we all have distinctive timing and when we are in our correct timing, all things as the scriptures says become lovely and beautiful flowing with the grace and hand of God. We only begin to remorse and stay in shame if we have no longer considered the right timing of God and feature walked in our own way.
Do now not hurry, calm yourself down and attention on what surely topics and others will come on later. life is not approximately marriage and having children, it’s about having a reason to live and walking in the suitable and complete will of God whether or not you’re married or not.
Seek counsel first
The scriptures makes it clear for any believer and reader of it that in the multitude of many counsel there dwell safety. It is okay to walk with your own understanding and counsel but the multitude of counsel guarantees safety for us.
Marriage and dating has not started with us and neither will it end with us, your parents are a testimony to this thing, your brothers and elders are a testimony, they have walked the corners of this street and they know where to buy strength and courage and peace when you need it the most, trust them for once.
No man is an island and neither is any man who has attained mastery in all things. We all seek perfection in one thing or the other and when it comes to dating and marriage, there is a lesson always that you might not have considered in your curriculum and thought it would exist in this vast field but with interaction from the different masters and experts, you begin to explore all the sidewalks and hidden places in the great subject.
Never forsake counsel, even the most useless thing or person can teach you the biggest lesson of your life, what you thought you knew maybe in a thing might not be the correct information and when we compare and contrast our notes, we see how we can make adjustment and ride on the right side seeing where we are truly going.
Find and love work
The man is made to be the vision bearer and the leader of things. This was in the mind of God on creating us. Look at Adam, after God created everything and gave man to protect it and tend it, then he considered giving him a companion to help with this work.
This sets a perfect example for us that before we start thinking of dating which is intended to lead to marriage. We have to find what to do and bear visions of great things and be engaged and involved in the working of it.
Generally, women will always look for a man who has something to do and has a scary dream and vision and when put down on the table, it will be laughed at. This is how God made them, they are made to come and supplement, to help with the big project and unless you can explain the project to them and they can see it, they will take you for a joke.
The man has the mandate to take care of the wife and not the other way but it is also okay if the wife can provide for the family because provision and taking care are two different things. Before considering finding love first find work and get a vision and not the other way then you will definitely need a helper to help achieve the dream.
Work and job are different, one might have a job and not work and vice versa. When you are not doing the things God has called you for, then you do not have work yet though we might be having a very busy and big job. Find something to do for yourself and for God then you have work.
Do not keep it a secret
Secrets can sometime turn out to be dark. The light always wants to expose everything that comes its own way so that they are clearly seen that they are in the light. Why do you hide it when you know it is okay and right to get married or have a girlfriend? There should be a big question when things are done in secret.
This does not mean that you go singing and announcing it on the mountaintop but your close friends and family must know about it. This will be beneficial in giving you advice and observing what you might have been blind to see, everything is approved by a word of two or three witnesses.
Secrets can stink sometimes, a secret covered when unveiled might do more damage than healing, let people know you want to start seeing each other or you are already seeing each other. There is no shame in love when done in light and not a misconceived idea of what some may define as love.
Do not keep secret from others, in dating, you are intending to share the same flesh and the experience of one flesh must be known and reconciled by the other flesh, and if there is an error made, correction is considered and trust is built. Keeping secrets shows lack of trust and identity in what you believe in, if you love her, do not keep her a secret, let your friends and family members know about it.
Understand the love of God
Dating and marriage is not a game for amateurs, the amateur play it for pleasure and excitement but the professional play it because nations and lives depend on it. A nation can only come out of a womb that only come because of marriage that is brought about by dating. This is the line of things.
You have to learn from the master and the master of love is God for he is love. We can only play a game according to its rule if we are trained the right rule and way of playing. If God is love, all who intend to find love must first understand what love is before you look for what you do not know or have an incomplete and scattered idea about.
What we as human describe as love is not what God defines as love. To us love might mean romance, sweet talk and pearl handling but this is not what God sees as love. God sees agape as love, this is the love that seeks to embrace even when it is hard to embrace, it will always consider others first and take no evil account of them, this love always cover up a lot and believes the best out of everyone.
It is not easy to love when there is no good communication or when there is a secret revealed, or an affair dangerous detected, this will only take the understanding of Agape that will heal and restore and build the broken bridges and the cracked walls. This is why we have to first understand this while considering or already dating, this is the core.
Understand the purpose of dating
We might get so busy finding love or enjoying the company of our girlfriend and we forget to know the real deal and purpose of dating. Everything is done with purpose and purpose is discovered. You must know the purpose and reason why you are dating or want to date.
It should not just be a mistake that you are dating. We do not just date for the sake of dating, we do not just marry for the sake of marriage, and we must understand and find the purpose of it. For in finding the purpose is the peace and confidence in a thing.
Dating is a big part of a very great mystery that is the mystery of marriage. We cannot just afford to be like everyone else in the world who dates sometimes for fun or for pleasure, we have to date intentionally and this is why undertaking why we date is important.
Dating is a time where we understand our partner and connect to them and see if they are the right one for marriage. It is a time of learning and unlearning many characters and habits. This is why you have to involve the parents and their friends because that is on only way you can truly understand your spouse.
Be prepared to sacrifice
Love is a game of sacrifice, sacrificing what is valuable to you but might not benefit both of you. Sacrifice is the language best expressed and understood in love. Look at God for example, in His love for humanity; He had to sacrifice his beloved son Jesus, there is no love without sacrifice.
Anything that involves commitment will definitely need sacrifice. It is easy to just meet someone one day and it ends there, there is no sacrifice, but when you decide to be together for a long time, then this test will definitely be the next thing on our calendar.
This is one thing many who have divorced, ran out of relationships or fear to get into a relationship have seen. Commitment is one tough choice that many will never make in their lives, they would rather keep their habit than give them up because of their girlfriend. You have to be ready and willing to sacrifice in order to have a good season.
Sacrifice involves a lot; you might have to give up the games on a weekend just because your girlfriend needs you, you might have to damp some habits and cultures just because your girlfriend feels offended by them, all this requires the courage and patience and the spirit of sacrifice.
Set boundaries not to cross
Boundaries are more necessary to Christians than to any other people. Other guys can play around and get involved in dirty games and complicated issues and it might be fine with them but it is never fine with us as Christians.
We should never use this time to fulfil our sensual and sexual desires and this is why setting boundaries is important. We have to keep ourselves pure from all sorts of malice and things that will stain us because we have been called to live a pure and holy life.
The big question many will definitely ask themselves is “how far is too far”. Is kissing your girlfriend bad, is having sex when not yet married a sin, can I sleep together with her or should I invite her over for the weekend, all these make boundaries important.
Boundaries have to be set between the two of you and has to be inspired and revealed by the word of God. What the scripture says about certain things should give us the permission or the restrain from it, when the scriptures say sex before marriage is fornication it is and so circumstances and things that might tempt us into that act should be drawn a red line over. For example staying together in secret laces for long hours, this is setting boundaries.
Fall in love with God.
The temptation during this time can be dealt away with if God is your first priority. Before we can truly love, we have to love God. He is the beginning and the end and all things begin and end in him. Falling in love with him will melt all the other characters and behavior and desires which are ungodly and sets in our hearts the desires and characters of God.
Making God your first priority will always mean that you consider him before any decision or choice. He knows everything and if you make Him your priority by falling in love with him, you will get the right guidance and direction to take in finding love or loving someone.
If God is not in the center, this opens up room for any attack of the enemy and all sorts of evil desires will entangle us. Choose God first before anything else, even your fiancé, this is what will make us to see even in the places where some in relationship do not see, we see the beginning and the end of everything and so we are guaranteed the best.